In last Friday’s H.U.G.S. interview featuring a conversation about how we relate to time between Jake (my husband) and Gay Hendricks, the author of many personal development books, and now mystery novels, I promised to share with you the miracle that came when my perception of time changed.
For years I have consistently wished for a few things. One has been for my business to thrive and make a huge impact in the world. The other has been for my husband and me to be on the same page when it comes to spirituality and God. Until the other week, I felt let down by time and confused.
In my own business, I feel like I have followed inspiration and walked my talk to the best of my ability for years, without the rewards streaming in. At times when business is growing, I feel great and on my path. However, during the times when business is slow (usually when I am growing) or when a launch or training did not sell out, I have been confused and upset because the timing and reward did not pan out the way I wanted them too.
The same letdown also happened in my marriage—for years. Jake and I would attend church and I would think our beliefs were lining up. Then bam! Something would shift and we would be off again. Jake believed in “something” but did not have a personal relationship with anything. This was hard for me to live with and stay objective, accepting and open. If you have been in my community for even a week, you know I teach about God a lot. I love spirit, and my personal relationship with God is the most important part of my life. So having a husband who did not desire to know God was a challenge.
This brings me to my change of perspective and the miracle “stress-melter” I promised you. There are three ways we can relate to time. The first two, Jake and Gay cover nicely in their conversation (you can listen here), so I will give you a brief review.
1) Time as a constant 86,400 seconds in a day. When we relate to time this way it is restrictive, although we need it for scheduling appointments and to win a race. When we focus on getting things done in a set time (especially creative things), we often run out of time, which builds more stress and negative self-talk due to unmet expectations.
2) Honoring the clock while not being restricted by it. This is what Gay talks about in his book, The Big Leap. When you relax your body and actively don’t set up expectations around when things should happen, then time expands. Your relationship with time literally shifts as you let go of the stress and compression in your body, which allows you to stress less and your creativity to flow. This helps with problem-solving as well as simply lowering your blood pressure.
Now that you know how to melt your stress away, let me share with you the third way to understand time. This is the realization that helped me to instantly release the upset and confusion I had hung onto for years around both my business not being as successful (yet) as I desire and my husband and I not being on the same spiritual path.
What I noticed is that I had been feeling punished and let down by God, because I had put in the work and been a good wife. I had and continue to stretch myself and my own growth, so why was I not getting the results I wanted now?
3) Divine Timing. God is not of our world—we are in God’s world. C.S. Lewis explains this relationship the best in his book, Meer Christianity. “If God ‘foresaw’ our acts, it would be very hard to understand how we could be free not to do them. But suppose God is outside and above the Time-line… You never supposed that your actions at this moment were any less free because God knows what you are doing. Well, He knows your tomorrow’s actions in just the same way—because He is already in tomorrow and can simply watch you. In a sense, He does not know your action till you have done it: but the moment at which you have done it is already ‘NOW’ for Him.”
There is not past or future for God—no rush, not deadlines, no expectations in time because every moment is NOW.
Now—for the miracles.
Coincidence or not, the topic of time brought up by me, then Gay, and then C.S. Lewis not only changed my perspective of time but also changed my husband’s relationship with God. I am happy to say that somehow after 10 years we are now on the same page. Not in my timing, not in Jake’s timing, but in God’s timing. I had lessons to learn, as did Jake in his walk with Faith, and no matter how hard we planned, pushed, prayed or desired a real union with God, it did not happen, until God’s timing happened.
I also received relief about my businesses and trainings. The mad rush to get it all done, be noticed and respected by millions of billions of fans and my desire to be living on my sailboat already all vanished. Letting go of this pressure and the expectation and judgment I put on myself has literally made my everyday life even more fun. The work I do get to share with you, my community, is happening in perfect timing, Divine Timing.
It seemed that no matter how many programs I created or courses I launched, I was striving for more and rushing to get things done. This was stressful and when the numbers I attached to my lofty goals did not line up with reality I would beat myself up about it.
With this new understanding of time and acceptance within it, I feel blessings all around. I feel satisfied and confident and content because I am doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing with who I am supposed to be serving, no more and no less. The stress has melted off my shoulders to get more done, and I have plenty of time.
Thank you for being a part of my family NOW!! I have a group of very, very special blogs from my new eBook coming out this month – How to Capture Love and Transform Your Life. Tune in if you are ready to receive more miracles and love in your life.
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Lots of Love,